I really, really, really didn't want to stop in Roswell, New Mexico.
I'd heard so many horror stories about how bad the tourist stuff was. But not fun bad. Offensively bad.
Roswell's claim to fame is that an alien spaceship crashed there in 1947 (depicted in this artist's rendering).
In the late '90s, the alien craze took over and Roswell went with it. It's a certifiable tourist hell.
But I was passing through, and I knew I'd kick myself if I didn't at least stop and walk around.
I took pains to avoid the "UFO Museum and Research Center."
According to former victims, the "exhibits" inside include cardboard cutouts of C-3P0 and Mister Spock. Like the kind you can buy at K-Mart for fifteen bucks.
Their brochure shows their most elaborate exhibit, the "Alien Autopsy." They actually popped for an old mannequin, a surplus hospital bed, and a dead alien from the halloween catalog.
Across the street from the museum is "Alien Resistance HQ," promising "Rare Books, Beverages, & Truth." You want a treat? Go to the web site printed on the front of the building.
Aliens hate Saddam Hussein.
The town leaders are starting to resist the schlocky bad tourist hell reputation the Alien folks have made. Note the lightpole banner in the top right of the picture. Too little, too late.
Even the parking lot was full of interesting bumper stickers.
This actual Defense Department vehicle sported a Terrorist Hunting Permit.
They probably would have enjoyed this gift shop item - the happiest stuffed Declaration of Independence I've ever seen!